![]() Not Burt though, that’s pure unfiltered confidence. No bare-faced man would dare take this picture. You try bedding Angelina Jolie without a mustache and you will fail. There was a time that Brad dated the sweet girl, didn’t want to get married, and wasn’t the coolest guy in every room. ![]() If you ever find yourself in its presence, just let the glory wash over you.īe honest, you didn’t think Brad Pitt would be on this list did you? I’m not surprised he is on the list, as Pitt as always enjoyed wearing a good mustache, but I am a little surprised that he is this high on the list. It was like it had a glowing light behind it. I’m here to tell you that his mustache stood out more than the model did and it wasn’t close. The most unexpected thing that I saw was Geraldo walking by me with a model on his arm and rocking a mustache that had its own aura. Meatloaf’s Daughter, and even saw Bob Saget walking around at what appeared to be 8 feet tall. It was a crazy few days where I found myself doing shots with Scott Ian and his wife, Mrs. I was staying at the Hard Rock in Vegas for New Year’s a few years back. I know that this is unexpected, but just hear me out. “Who would win in Indianapolis 500, the race cars or The Bears team bus? Is Ditka driving the bus? Well then I like Da’ Bears.” Mike Ditka is a man, son! Robert Smigel, one of the best comedy writers of all time, took a very solid sketch on SNL and parlayed that into an outlet for Ditka love. Have you ever watched the “Hello” video? I mean really watched it? It’s creepy as shit!! Does anyone care that he is practically stalking a blind girl and is a borderline pedophile? No, because when you have that beautiful ‘stache you can do what you want in life. Do you think Lionel Richie could have survived in the music industry without that ‘stache? Probably, but it never hurts to run up the score when the opportunity presents itself. ![]() He’s been bringing that sweet mustache into your home since 1989, and have you ever thanked him for it? No, no you haven’t. You are damn straight I put Ned Flanders on this list and he absolutely deserves it. He has the most upside of anyone else on this list, but pump the brakes on calling him the “manliest,” ok? All of those things are somewhat true, but calm down, hipster, he’s still new to the mustache game and made the top ten. He’s on the best sitcom on television, too. Offerman is the manliest guy in Hollywood right now. Hollywood actor, sports star, TV personality…all are in the running. Finally, we are going into any realm with this list.It needs to be something that is as much a part of your life as your favorite shirt. You can’t be a part-time mustache-wearer and qualify for the list.Real men with real mustaches don’t show off or look for attention for it. If you have ever entered into any sort of mustache or facial hair competition then you are off of the list.Come on Derek, you’re better than that).įirst off, we need to establish a few ground rules to make sure we are getting the cream of the crop. So, who is currently rocking a ‘stache with confidence and elegance today? I’m glad you asked. Think about that for a second…A president, maybe the most popular president in history (anyone else have a beloved stuffed animal named after them?), and the man who is considered the smartest of all time both had a mustache. Teddy ranks number 1 in ‘stache history, and is closely followed by Albert Einstein at number 2. A true fact that I made up for this column: When Teddy Roosevelt said, “Speak softly and carry a big stick,” he was talking about his mustache. You will never smile like this in your life I don’t care if you win the lottery, marry Marion Cotillard, and win the Superbowl in the same day – you will never smile like this. Do you see that smile on Teddy’s face? That is the smile of a man who knows he is doing it better than you.
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